Anyway, the thing that has been on my mind is a beautiful and important subject. It's mostly about love towards anything or anyone, and can be described only as the beauty of caring.
All of us have heard the lyrics to that one song that hit us deep at some point of our lives. All of us have (hopefully) had the tingling sensation of hearing something so beautiful that it goes right to your stomach. Well, I've been thinking about the importance of those words and those actions in everyday life, and how big of an impression they leave on a person.
See, I've always been the kind of a person who values romance and beauty beyond naive. I very much still do, but I've (thank god) come to terms with the idea that the actual fairytale that I've been searching for doesn't exist. Still, I seem to live in my own little world of romance and wonders and sometimes it hurts to see how cruel and rough this world can be.
"The world is no longer a romantic place.
Some of its people still are, however,
and therein lies the promise.
Don't let the world win."
-John Cage, Ally McBeal
So I dream. I dream about finding those people in this world who appreciate and love me for who I am, unconditionally and throughout. Those, who value each thought and are there to talk some sense into me when my world is falling apart. Those, who can tell me to shut up and I know I really should listen. I dream of a love that overcomes all obsticles, that sees every imperfection perfectly and that makes you go crazy as hell sometimes. Something that is so beautiful that there are no words to describe it, and something that makes you miss it every second that it's away with every fiber of your being.
Unfortunately these things are hard to find. Sometimes I feel alone thinking this way, and most of the time seeing everything so beautifully and missing something so badly makes me seem insane to others. Usually in romantic relationships I end up being the one who cares more, and it's not something you should wish for, even though the greatest moments of it can make you so high you're not sure you're ever coming down.
I love it, really. It makes me go crazy sometimes, it makes me appear dramatic to others, but the feeling you get from those great moments, when you momentarily think you're exactly where you should be, or everything around you appears to you so beautiful it makes you want to cry, it's worth all that. My deep emotions and all the beauty I've seen or heard have made me appreciate everything more, and to hope and to dream, sometimes even beyond rationality. And all that will remain with me, in my memories all my life.
So I'll keep dreaming. I'll keep dreaming the world would be just a little more softer on people. That the love people feel would be extraordinary and always kind. That people would find their other halves, those who they just know are their own pieces of perfect and show it to them every day for the rest of their lives. I hope everyone finds those friends who stick with you through thick and thin, and nothing can ever come between that special bond you have, not other people, not time, not money, not anything. Keep dreaming, keep seeing beauty all around and treat people like they deserve to be treated. I beg of you, please, make this world just a little bit more of caring.
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